Money is too light, hard work comes; luxury is not learning, self-picked.
 
  There is a saying that: Poor and poor can not be poor education, and then can not bitter children.
 
  Looking at it, many parents are shrinking their own clothes, but they don’t look good when they buy high-end brands.
 
  To reach out to the children's clothes, to open their mouths, and to do a little bit of housework is not willing to let the children do;
 
  Parents have not been willing to travel a few times, but when children want money to participate in the country tour, even if they borrow money to sign up.
 
  What happened to such a child when he grew up?
 
  1
 
  The more you love your child, the more chilling you are.
 
  There used to be news, and after reading it, people can’t forget it for a long time:
 
  The 32-year-old Yang graduated from Weinan Normal University. He is the only child. He was the apple of his family when he was a child. His parents were reluctant to let him suffer a little bit of grievances and save money for him to finish college.
 
  Since he had never suffered from childhood, after entering the society, Yang first tasted the hardships and difficulties of life. He thought of his own cold eyes and the white eyes he encountered. His psychology gradually became distorted, and he conceived himself in his mind every day. How can I make money quickly?
 
  One day, he stumbled upon the accident that the insurance company would make huge compensation if he encountered an accident after purchasing insurance. He immediately handled a number of insurances for his parents for personal accidents and high disability.
 
  Then, he personally cooked his parents to mix the prepared nitrite into the bought beef. When he was eating, he took the initiative to put the poisonous beef in his parents' bowl.
 
  But the parents loved their son too much. They wanted to leave it to their son and they didn’t eat it.
 
  Yang not only did not have a bit of remorse, but also went to the kitchen, mixed with nitrite in the water, stirred it to the parents, and watched the parents drink.
 
  He watched his parents struggle and died, and finally opened the gas tank to create a scene of gas poisoning causing death.
 
  The emergence of this tragedy is of course the annihilation of Yang’s humanity, and the deeper reason is the excessive love of parents for Yang.
 
  From childhood, everything is arranged for the child, and the child is not allowed to suffer a little setback .
 
  As everyone knows, when such a child loses the shelter of the parents and goes to face the society alone, once the setback is encountered, the child's ability to withstand and resist is almost zero.
 
  Rousseau once said a word : "You know what method to use, we can make your child become unfortunate people do this is to obedience to him?."
 
  Your love, not only catches up with the child's life, let him bring the evil in nature to the extreme, and will catch up with his own life.
 
  2
 
  There are no born bear children, only parents who are missing education.
 
  There are no born bear children, only parents who are missing education. Those who can educate the nobles must be expensive.
 
  The so-called expensive is not the amount of wealth, but expensive in the parents' mind, in the pattern of parents, expensive in the parents' educational philosophy, more expensive in the parents' words and deeds.
 
  When it comes to Fan Zhongyan, people will blurt out "the world is worried and worried, and the world is happy and happy", but many people do not know that Fan Zhongyan's descendants are all eager to advance in school, and later they are famous and famous. The descendants have been passed down from generation to generation, and have lasted for eight hundred years.
 
  "Song History" evaluation Fan Zhongyan's son Fan Chunren said: "Pure benevolence is easy to be simplistic, not to add people with sensuality, where the friendship is, it is quite a lot of Qu. Since the cloth to the prime minister, the integrity is the same, the gift of giving They are all in the broad sense of Zhuang;
 
  "Qufu Old News" also records that Fan Zhongyan's grandson, Fan Zhengping, is studying outside the city. He is 20 miles away from the city. In the summer, he uses a broken fan to shade the sun. He goes to school for 40 miles every day. No one knows his father, Fan Chunren. Be a big official in the capital.
 
  All of this stems from the strict teaching of Fan Zhongyan, who often warns future generations: "The money is not light, hard work comes; luxury is easy to learn, self-picked." When Fan Chunren got married, he and his wife planned to use brocade as a wedding room. Decoration.
 
  Fan Zhongyan immediately called Fan Chunren to speak: "My family has always been clean and honest, and I can condone you so extravagantly, and broke my Fan family door! If you bring you into the house, I will burn it in court."
 
  In today's society, when the parents of many poor families do not let their children endure hardships and desperately raise their children into rich children, the rich people desperately want their children to suffer.
 
  Since childhood, Dong Mingzhu has focused on cultivating the spirit of his son's hardship. From small to large, Dong Mingzhu did not use his car to pick up his son once, and always let him go home by bus.
 
  One day, Dong Mingzhu and other sons came back to eat, and left and waited for the son to return home.
 
  When the son arrived home, he told Dong Mingzhu that he had waited for more than half an hour to wait for a car without an air conditioner.
 
  Therefore, her son has been strong and independent since he was a child . Even when he was in the college entrance examination, he was prepared to take the usual medicine to prevent accidents.
 
  After growing up, the son said: "Mom can start from scratch, I can."
 
  Although the mother's family is rich, but the son is a lawyer with a monthly salary of only five or six thousand, driving a car of about 100,000, the house is also rented.
 
  There are no shortcuts on the road to growth. Parents will eventually quit their children's lives, and those who are not suffering will get back one day.
 
  Therefore, if you really love your child, you should not put him in a honey pot. Instead, you should try your best to find the meaning and value of your struggle .
 
  In the face of the wind and rain, you can not be afraid, wait for the calm and calm, keep the cloud open and see the moon.
 
  3
 
  Smart parents know how to make children suffer.
 
  In fact, suffering itself does not make any sense. It is not to say which child eats more and more, and the ability to have it in the future will be greater.
 
  It is not the suffering that makes the child grow, but the sentiment and thinking after eating the bitterness, as well as the experience and sublimation of personal qualities.
 
  Therefore, simply suffering is not worthy of praise. Otherwise, is the street hobo who has suffered hardship not become a winner in life?
 
  What is praiseworthy is the ability to overcome suffering and the happiness gained after defeating suffering.
 
  Those who have read the book, I am afraid that everyone will recite Mencius’s "bitterness, labor and bones, hungry body..."
 
  However, many people have forgotten to start with their backs: Heaven will be reduced to the people.
 
  Therefore, many people have forgotten the ultimate goal of suffering, and the misfortune has become a noble glory.
 
  The same is true for children to suffer hardship. The true meaning of suffering is not simply a material grievance for the child, but for the child to overcome the suffering through hard work, to win what he really wants, and to gain the confidence of an independent life in the latter half of life.
 
  In July last year, US Chief Justice John Roberts said "swearing words" at the graduation ceremony of his son. At the same time as social media screens, it also triggered social considerations.
 
  “Usually, the speakers at the graduation ceremony will wish you good luck and blessings, but I will not do so.
 
  I hope that you will encounter unfair treatment from time to time in the years to come, so that you will understand the value of justice.
 
  May you taste the taste of betrayal, which will teach you the importance of understanding loyalty.
 
  May you have occasional bad luck, so that you will realize the position of opportunity in life, and then understand that your success is not destined, and the failure of others is not justified.
 
  When you encounter failure, I hope you will be ridiculed by your opponent's gloating, which will let you understand the importance of the spirit of competition.
 
  May you be ignored occasionally so that you can learn to listen; suffer the proper pain so that you can have compassion.
 
  Whether you or I want it or not, these will come sooner or later. Whether you can benefit from it depends on whether you can penetrate the message of life's suffering. ”
 
  Therefore, from an early age, let the children suffer hard, and think about the meaning of suffering, learn the wisdom to overcome suffering, let the children eat bitterly and meaningfully, and the parents will not suffer in their old age.