The day before yesterday, a friend’s career came to a bottleneck, and asked me how to make more money.
 
  I call him Li Ge, 35 years old this year. Currently looking for a job, the previous job has a monthly salary of 4,500, no bonus, no year-end award, and has worked for three years.
 
  He complained to me: It’s too hard for me to come out and find a job at this age.
 
  Li Ge interviewed eight companies in April, all of which were dropped by Pass. In fact, he delivered his resume to dozens of companies, and finally only 8 companies gave him the opportunity to interview.
 
  35-year-old looking for a job, so not waiting to see?
 
  Yes, there is a phenomenon in the workplace : 35-year-old phenomenon, many employers will clearly indicate the age of under 35 in the recruitment information.
 
  From a company perspective, I can understand such prejudice. Sometimes, prejudice exists, which means reasonable.
 
  1
 
  35-year-old phenomenon: abandoned middle-aged
 
  Why are 35-year-old people in the workplace suspected of being rejected?
 
  The first is physical strength: most of the middle-aged people in their thirties have been crushed for many years in the workplace. The body is not as strong as the young people. You work ten hours a day, and you tell yourself that you should pay attention to maintenance. And those who work for seventeen or eight hours can still enjoy it.
 
  The second is energy: most people in this age group already have a family, which means a lot more tie. When you get off work, you want to go home to cook for your child. Work is only part of life.
 
  而那些刚毕业,或者还不到30岁的年轻人,他们的生活里全是工作,为了梦想,全力以赴。
 
  再者是潜力:很多公司宁愿给新人涨薪1000元,也不给老员工涨500元,因为年轻人可挖的潜力更大,性价比高,而中年人身上的培养价值已然不大,更多地是在靠经验工作。
 
  中年职场人最大的优势:经验、人脉、资源。
 
  尴尬的是,很多工作了十年的人,他们只有一两年的工作经验,然后将这经验用了十年而已,成长空间小到可以忽略不计,而人脉和资源更是少的可怜。
 
  除非你可以自己带客户、资源过去,能够给新公司带来可看到的实际收益,不然还真难以找到满意的下家。
 
  最后还有一点,就是掌控力,在职场上待久了,或多或少会沾染上一些职场老油条的习性,没有年轻人那么听话。
 
  公司给年轻人画大饼,他们会听得热血沸腾,很卖力地干,但职场老鸟一听,就在心里说:又骗我,我待了多少家公司了,都这样。
 
  而且,他们还可能将这些职场经验分享给团队里的年轻人。这样,公司的凝聚力和战斗力就会下降。
 
  中年人跳槽、换工作其实挺尴尬的,就是因为有很多的限制在里面。
 
  2
 
  35岁前,要做的5件事
 
  如果你还没有到35岁,那么这篇文章将可能会拯救你的职业生涯和人生。
 
  为了尽量避免自己在35岁时,面临中年危机的窘境,我们需要在当下做好5件事。
 
  1、别混日子,学一技之长傍身:
 
  我一直都信奉这句话:出来混,迟早都是要还的。
 
  年轻的时候混日子,下场一般都会很惨,三十多岁还和毕业生的薪资相差不大,那说明你这些年并没有为此付出太多的努力,也可以想象到你的能力、经验、人脉、资源,这些日后将成为你资本的东西都很欠缺。
 
  所以,在年轻的时候,一定要努力提升自身能力,经营有价值的人脉,有必要拥有至少一个特长,日后即使出现变故,还有方向和出路。
 
  2、读书,多看实用的书:
 
  读书的重要性,很多文章都讲烂了,就不多讲了。不管什么阶段,人都要保持阅读,那么看什么书呢?
 
  励志的书要看,但要少看,看这些书,并不是要模仿别人的成功轨迹,而是要保持心怀希望,有继续努力的驱动力。
 
  实用的书要多看,比如和你专业技能相关的书,比如一些为人处事道理的书,比如一些兴趣方面的书,这些或能提升自我,或可以成为社交谈资。
 
  3、锻炼,不为体型,只为健康:
 
  成年人的身体总是在走下坡路,锻炼是为了身体在报废的路上走得慢一点。
 
  年轻的时候,可以拼命工作,但也别忘了要努力锻炼身体,不是为了保持好有型的身材,就是为了健康,为了有体力过好人生的下半场。
 
  此外,更实际的理由,就是省钱,为了以后少去医院。
 
  4、学会做工作的设计者:
 
  工作中,我们必须时刻保持清醒与警觉,其中最重要的一点在于,不要每天被动等待别人安排我们的时间,我们要努力把控自己的工作节奏,让其他人配合你而不是主宰你的工作。
 
  在开展工作的时候,你不妨思考以下几点:
 
  资源:你需要明确自己的能力及特质,以及你打算做到多少分,在多长时间内完成;
 
  顺序:设计或重新安排一个能在最短时间内聚焦最核心业务的顺序;
 
  借力:凡事不需要亲力亲为,可以的话找眼疾手快的人帮你完成。
 
  5、挣钱、积累资金、投资:
 
  我从来不羞于谈钱,满身的铜臭味,我觉得在年轻的时候,功利一点,没什么不好的。
 
  如果一家公司,你既学不到东西,又挣不到多少钱,也得不到多大的资源、人脉,那你就别过于留恋,果断选择离开。
 
  在35岁之前,最好要尽可能地多积累资金,以备未来的变故,要学会投资,不要让钱闲着。
 
  不要懒,条件允许的情况下,多接触新鲜事物,做一个斜杠青年,既可赚钱,又可摸索新出路,今天走的路,每一步都有深意。
 
  35岁,不是人生的起点,更不是终点,虽然车到山前必有路,但我希望在年轻的时候还是要多做一些准备,别到时候手忙脚乱,痛哭流涕。
 
  努力终有意义,希望人到中年,我们的人生还控制在自己手里。
 
  3
 
  你还未至中年,中年危机已现
 
  随着年龄的增长,婚姻、事业、家庭等一列问题和危机到来,躁动、沮丧、恐惧、担忧等等,我们面临这非常大的困惑和压力。
 
  原本很快乐幸福的生活或者很感兴趣的事情,现在却开始厌倦、不满意或没兴趣,甚至开始怀疑自己的人生没有意义。
 
  然而现在的问题是,还未至中年,中年危机已现。本该奋斗的年纪充满了困惑和焦虑。
 
  为什么会困惑和焦虑?因为不知道路在何方,不知道自己的目标,不知道自己的定位。
 
  就像一只没有罗盘的船,迷失在茫茫人海中,使劲挣扎,却看不到出路。那些目标明确的人,一开始就已经赢了。
 
  怎么样做才能变得更好呢?你要很认真很认真的思考以下几个问题,并将思考结果写在你的本子上天天去翻看并为之付诸行动。
 
  1、你未来的样子是什么样的?
 
  首先问你一个问题,对你来说,什么样的生活才是更好的生活呢?你希望的人生是什么样子的呢?
 
  是月入5万有车有房,是琴棋书画能说会唱,是世界那么大我想去看看……
 
  给自己描绘一幅清晰的蓝图吧,如果连自己想要的生活都没有想清楚,那奋斗的目标又在哪里呢?
 
  2、快速找到自己的定位。
 
  很多人忙活了一辈子,却连自己想要什么都没搞清楚。忙忙碌碌,小心翼翼地活着。
 
  今天想做面包师,明天想当室内设计师,后天想成为园艺师……
 
  世界这么大,诱惑这么多。
 
  在一件事情还没有学成的时候就放弃,然后去做下一件事情,然后又放弃……兜兜转转,循环往复,像故事里那只扳苞谷的猴子一样,最后什么也没有得到。
 
  我们活着,欲望无穷无尽,我们不可能一个一个地去把它们做完。
 
  兴趣很多怎么办?
 
  先有一专,再有多长。
 
  因此,我们要学会取舍,去做自己定位相关的事情。
 
  什么是定位呢?就是自己做起来很容易,但是别人做起来就相对困难的事情。通过这些别人做起来很难,我们做起来相对容易的高价值的事情,我们才能用最小的代价,做到专业,过上我们想过的生活。
 
  3、现在就去做,不要拖延
 
  There are three kinds of people in this world: those who are unwilling to work hard and hard; those who want to be mediocre for a lifetime; and those who live the most tangled days, who are unwilling to be mediocre but do not want to do it. Such people are always confused and tangled between reality and the future, and spend a lot of time between doing and not doing.
 
  Don't choose comfort at the age of the most struggle.
 
  There is a saying "You are weak, the years will become a killing knife, and you will slowly kill you invisible; you are strong, the years are a beauty knife to help you shape the most perfect life."
 
  Different life perceptions will determine different attitudes and achieve different life attitudes.  "For personal reasons, you cannot continue working in the company and apply for resignation."
 
  When I signed my name on the application form for the termination of employment of the state-owned enterprise and stamped it with a red thumb, I asked myself, are you really ready to leave this stable environment?
 
  At that time, I still didn't know how to go in the future.
 
  Because, I am naked.
 
  The most impressive thing was that on the day of submitting the resignation application form, everyone who saw it had a friendly smile on his face. Even the uncle who was not very fond of talking, also gave me a cigarette, saying that he often came back to see.
 
  So when I packed up and walked out of the door of the unit, I remembered what my dad said:
 
  "From the departure of state-owned enterprises, only you are willing to give up."
 
  Think about it, it’s really a bit unwilling.
 
  1
 
  In fact, there will be this idea, but also because there is still a place for me to stay in love.
 
  In the secular sense, working in state-owned enterprises represents decent and stable.
 
  When I learned that I entered the state-owned enterprise, my parents were happy to be like a prize, and everyone said. The next day, a lot of relatives and friends sent me a message of congratulations.
 
  In our small county town, if you enter a state-owned enterprise or become a civil servant, you will be given a high look.
 
  In my aunt's statement, "I don't want to have a good object in the future. It is convenient to do anything."
 
  But for me, this job really makes me feel excited, it is 4:30 off work time.
 
  Focus on the 4:30.
 
  My position is an account manager. I go to work at 8:30 in the morning. The work includes calling and communicating with customers, regularly visiting customers and finishing report accounts.
 
  Visiting the customer every day, returning to the company almost three o'clock in the afternoon, and then packing some hands and tails, talking to colleagues about the house price stock market, you can get off work.
 
  Before the 4:29 punch card machine, the queue was sometimes arranged.
 
  After work at 4:30, it was the beginning of my life.
 
  In order not to let myself flow in mediocrity, I confessed that " life is tossing" and I gave myself a "satisfaction max" schedule.
 
  The nine-to-five life gives me plenty of time to do what I like.
 
  Photography and writing are the only sources of accomplishment I have had during that time. To a certain extent, I am a person who needs to be nourished by the “sense of accomplishment”.
 
  Although I have not been able to accurately describe what this "sense of accomplishment" is at the time. But having a skill, I still have more performance opportunities in state-owned enterprises.
 
  When the organization organizes the activities, colleagues will let me help to take pictures; when the meeting is held, the leaders will arrange for me to write the draft.
 
  This also means that my name can be seen and remembered by more leaders.
 
  I think, maybe only one chance, you can get promoted.
 
  Before this opportunity came, I took the initiative.
 
  2
 
  I began to feel good about myself.
 
  Three things happened before I got the idea of ​​leaving.
 
  The first thing is to chat with a sister who is doing new media operations.
 
  She graduated a year later than me. From the ideas and skills of the public operation, to the analysis of competitive products and market analysis, she can share her understanding and experience.
 
  Every point she said, I can hardly give feedback, because I know nothing about it.
 
  I suddenly found out that our thinking and pattern are no longer a hierarchy.
 
  When I think of college, I still grow up with her, and now she is far ahead of me. The distorted contrast, like oral ulcers, makes me anxious and irritable.
 
  Anxiety is your own ignorance, and irritability is that you have no way to do this.
 
  I have to be polite to say "you are right" and "excellent", but I dare not say that "your present is what I want to have, full of sense of accomplishment."
 
  "Is it wrong?" This is my first time to doubt the choice of state-owned enterprises.
 
  The second thing is that a teacher of the same batch has left.
 
  On the qualifications and abilities, she is completely above me, and therefore she is very heavy on the leader. Everyone has the impression that she is: the future is like Jinjinjinjinjinjin.
 
  But in the eighth month of her employment, she offered to leave. She told me something I remembered now: "I started to feel good about myself."
 
  I remember that in those eight months, I spent the most time myself, not doing what I like, but going to a meeting of colleagues and friends. As for the list of "achievement max" that I gave myself, many times I just Dust in the corner.
 
  The rest of the schedule, I will draw a stroke on each day, every five days, there will be a "positive" word. And when I took it out, it was just lying alone six and a half "positive".
 
  It turned out that I have been through it for a long time.
 
  So the sentence that the sister said, it was easy to knock me down. Just like you shouting to lose weight, you still have a little cup of water every day, and you will feel the kind of intuitive blow when you stand on the scale two months later.
 
  I finally realized that I was a self-motivated person, and in this comfort circle of “not working really really comfortable”, it is difficult for me to be assimilated and to talk about what I feel.
 
  It is the third thing that really makes me feel like I am leaving.
 
  Once I went to a meeting, and there were many people in the closed conference room. After waiting for about ten minutes, the three long-awaited leaders came in.
 
  One is lean, a little bit of the Mediterranean, smoking causes the teeth to be black and yellow;
 
  One is quite a belly, and the crotch is swaying hard when walking, and the keychain hanging on the belt creaks;
 
  One combed the oil head, it was normal, but when I sat down, I played in the official office. After talking for half an hour, I said, "I said so much at the beginning. The following is the topic of today's meeting. It is mainly divided into three parts..."
 
  To be honest, I couldn’t remember what I said at the meeting that day. I just remembered that I was sitting in the corner, watching their mouths sullen, dizzy, and there was a pain in the stomach.
 
  That was the first time in my life that I clearly felt that "a sentence caused physical discomfort."
 
  In fact, I know that there are such scenes in other companies, but this kind of scene has given me a very strong idea:
 
  If one day I have the opportunity to be promoted to their rank, almost the same dressing is about the same, the young people like me are sitting below, will they see me like this?
 
  Then I should hate myself very much.
 
  Thinking of this, I know that this is not the place I should stay.
 
  I'm going to resign.
 
  3
 
  However, if you want to leave the state-owned enterprises, it is not that you have the final say.
 
  The biggest resistance to leaving the job is actually from the family.
 
  When I first thought of my departure with my dad, he thought that I was joking. He said, "Well, go home and take a civil servant when you leave."
 
  When I seriously expressed my attitude and the reasons for leaving, he realized that I was not talking about it.
 
  Because of the different ideas, we can't avoid a dispute every time we call, and then break up in "I must do what I like" and "It's too turbulent outside and you are too ignorant."
 
  In the next few days, my uncle called to persuade me, probably meaning "the state-owned enterprises are guaranteed, and the private enterprises say it will fall."
 
  I also sent a WeChat to me, telling her life experience and how much her friends in the state-owned enterprises are now. "The older the employees are, the more valuable they are, the more you don't understand."
 
  There is also a tweet in the family group that is similar to the "XX employees of the XX state-owned enterprises who are resigned, and now sit barefoot in the train station."
 
  What made me most worried was the message my mother sent me. She said: If you resign, I will feel sad for a lifetime.
 
  In the past, I chose the latter in the two things "I like it" and "Let my parents be happy." But during this period of time after graduation, I feel more and more that "doing myself" and "filial piety" are two different things, and there is no conflict or contradiction.
 
  Contradictory is also the understanding of the "sense of accomplishment" by two generations.
 
  Standing in the position of parents, their generation has suffered too much. The reason why we want to choose a stable state-owned enterprise or civil servant is that we can live comfortably and comfortably if we have the choice.
 
  This is what they think is the greatest sense of accomplishment in life.
 
  It’s just that they sometimes ignore it. Compared to “easy and comfortable,” our generation will be more concerned about the “self-fulfilling” sense of accomplishment.
 
  At that time, I also knew that I could not explain to them at the moment, and I could only speak by time.
 
  Of course, in the end, I still couldn't convince my dad. I had to tell him: "I really can't force you to understand me, but I will be responsible for the decision I made. Please give me time."
 
  After knowing that I couldn’t persuade me anyway, he sent me a few words -
 
  He said: "Is the home a safe haven when it comes to storms?"
 
  I said, "Yes, always."
 
  Finally, he said: "Well, I wish you a smooth journey! When you are in the storm, don't forget to have a safe haven."
 
  When I saw these words, I was sitting on the balcony and watching the night cut by the anti-theft net. I couldn’t stop crying, and my heart was relieved.
 
  4
 
  After leaving the state-owned enterprise, I have regretted it more than once.
 
  Many friends asked me if I regretted leaving the state-owned enterprises. The answer is yes.
 
  After leaving the job, I went to an advertising company, which was completely different in work intensity and rhythm, like a hard-working person screwing a rusty gear.
 
  When I was overwhelmed by the project, when I worked overtime until 4:30 in the morning, when I was on the roadside to change the PPT, when I was questioned by my boss.
 
  I have regretted it.
 
  Whenever these moments, I want to drill back into the stable and decent environment. I repeatedly asked myself: Why? does it worth? How to do?
 
  There is no answer.
 
  And I can only cheer on myself by relying on the phrase "striping my own way, screaming at the street."
 
  But now, one year after the departure of the state-owned enterprise, when I look back at this experience, I will feel that this decision is correct.
 
  When I have self-doubt many times, I went to do various professional personality tests, and even found a professional consultant who is 600 yuan for one and a half hours. What I want to determine is, what kind of work is it for me?
 
  The test results point to, my sense of accomplishment comes from "output personal value" and "affect others."
 
  I realized that this is why I like photography and writing, and why I was touched when I talked to my sisters about new media work.
 
  And because of this, I chose to work for the company I currently like.
 
  During the two months here, when I discussed the topic with the editors until two in the morning, when I lost a few hairs and finally wrote my favorite article, I saw the reader’s sincere message and feedback in the background. The decision to make is correct.
 
  Because I can clearly understand that I am being nourished by the "sense of achievement."
 
  5
 
  Not a state-owned enterprise is not good,
 
  I want a sense of accomplishment
 
  My friend asked me, do you think that state-owned enterprises are not good?
 
  On the contrary, state-owned enterprises are much better than many jobs in terms of welfare protection and cost-effectiveness. Therefore, some friends have resigned to test state-owned enterprises or civil servants after working in private enterprises for several years.
 
  But what I want to talk about is about the "sense of accomplishment".
 
  From Maslow's demand theory, the highest level of human demand is “self-fulfilling demand”.
 
  From this perspective, every job is just a tool, as long as you can get the self-fulfilling needs from it, it is a good job.
 
  If you know what your source of accomplishment is, congratulations; if not, then I will encourage you to find it and embrace it.
 
  I really like a reality show, "Amazing Life," where every amateur guest is engaged in ordinary work. They may not have success in secular sense , but you will find that they can find their own achievements. Feeling.
 
  In the 9th issue of "The Adventures of Life", Zhao Lixin and Bai Jugang came to Iceland and worked with an artist, Schwanner, to fulfill his eleven years of his wish - an art about fire, showing the dance between humans and elves.
 
  "It’s good." I sighed as I looked.
 
  The crowd sat around the campfire, admiring the art of rotation, chatting about the sky, singing songs.
 
  Bai Jugang said:
 
  "In fact, there is nothing that makes people feel amazed. But Shivana's eyes are bright and satisfy his heart.
 
  Mainly his desires, occurrences, processes, and results are his own. You have done a work, won an award, satisfied others, and others recognized.
 
  He is his own and it is the hardest to satisfy himself. ”
 
  The last sentence is to share with you.