Mature people, see who is pleasing to the eye
 
  Ancient Chinese philosophers said what you saw and what you have in your heart.
 
  When Su Dongpo was young, he sat with Buddhism.
 
  Su Dongpo said: "Master, what do you think I am sitting here?"
 
  Buddha said: "It looks like a Buddha."
 
  Su Dongpo smiled and said: "But I see you like a bunch of bowel movements!"
 
  Buddha printed a smile.
 
  After returning home, Su Dongpo told Su Xiaomei about this.
 
  Su Xiaomei listened and said, "Because you are a Buddha, watching others will be like a Buddha. If you are a bowel movement, watching others will be like a bowel movement."
 
  Others are their own mirrors, you see what others are like, what are you.
 
  Seeing that others are not pleasing to the eye, it is necessary to pick people everywhere because it is not enough. Don't always want to change others, first adjust your mentality and fix your heart.
 
  First, mature people know how to change position
 
  Nan Huaiqi has such a sentence in the Analects of Confucius :
 
  People call the spirit of all things, people are blowing themselves, maybe in pigs, cows, dogs, horses, people are the worst of all things, "specially eat our pigs, cattle, dogs, horses."
 
  Everything in the world has its own position. Things that seem to be righteous in their own position, easy to live, may not look so pleasing to the eye.
 
  Mom likes to go shopping with a five-year-old child, but the child has been unwilling to go. My mother is very confused. There are so many goods in the shopping mall, so busy, how can I not like my children to like it.
 
  The mother once thought that the child deliberately made trouble with himself.
 
  Until one time, the child's shoelaces opened, and the mother crouched down to tie the laces for the child, and suddenly found a terrible sight that she had never seen before: the legs and arms were all shaking in front of her eyes.
 
  So she picked up the child and walked out of the store. Since then, even when she has to take her children to the store, she has put her children on her shoulders.
 
  Different positions see completely different things. Really mature people often understand empathy and know how to think in terms of others.
 
  Second, mature people do not judge easily
 
  Confucius traveled around the country. Once, Confucius and his disciples were hungry. Everyone did not eat rice for seven days. Yan returned to find some rice outside and took it back to cook. When the rice was cooked, Confucius accidentally saw Yan Hui pick up the lid and grabbed it. A handful of rice is stuffed into the mouth.
 
  Confucius left silently, pretending not to see, nor to blame Yan Hui.
 
  When the meal was cooked and the meal was given to Confucius, Confucius said, "I just dreamed of my ancestors. I thought, we should give the white rice that has not been moved in this pot, and sacrifice the ancestors first."
 
  Yan Hui immediately refused: "No! I have already taken a sip of this pot of rice, can not be used as a sacrifice!"
 
  Confucius looked at Yan Hui and said, "Why do you want to do this?"
 
  Yan Hui said: "Because when I was cooking, some dust was on the beam in the pot. I thought it was a pity to throw away the gray rice, so I grabbed it and ate it."
 
  Confucius heard and educated the disciples: "In normal times, I trust Yan Hui, but I will see him today. I will still doubt him. You should keep this in mind, and don't use your own opinions to measure others. It’s really not easy to know someone."
 
  Sometimes, even if you see it with your own eyes, it may not be correct. Everything should be analyzed and understood from many angles. Don't go too "subject" to "I think" and "I think", which is the most likely to cause misunderstanding.
 
  Third, mature people, know how to respect others
 
  There is a couple, the husband likes to eat durian, but the wife feels particularly stinky. She thinks that eating durian is simply unimaginable.
 
  But after marrying for decades, every time the wife visits the fruit shop, she will buy durians, then her husband will eat it on the lawn of the community, and then chew two chewing gums to prevent the taste from taking home.
 
  After being married for decades, the two have been in peace.
 
  The ancients have a cloud: "The son is not a fish, the joy of knowing the fish?"
 
  Everyone has their own way of living, have different lifestyles, hobbies, and face to those who can not understand, to be tolerant with a tolerant attitude.
 
  If you don't look at people, it may not be that someone else is wrong. It may just be that you can't understand it.
 
  Immature is self-centered and treats everything that is considered in my values ​​as unique. Contrary to his opinions, it is all wrong, low-level.
 
  Maturity means allowing and respecting others to be different from you, and not casually commenting on others.
 
  When you can't get used to other people, don't rush to judge. Think about changing your mind, knowing each other and respecting others.
 
  The so-called maturity is to constantly remove the "I hold", face the things we can not understand, no longer point to, but try to accommodate and accept.
 
  Seeing that everyone is pleasing to the eye is a kind of wisdom, but also a kind of practice.