Five years after graduation, I moved from a third-tier city to Shenzhen
 
  I wrote this topic, and I'm sitting on the 12th floor of a Shenzhen incubator startup factory and doing my favorite job.
 
  Eight years ago, I graduated from a second-rate university in a second-tier city. Many students have passed the postgraduate entrance examination, many students have gone abroad, and many students have gone to the north to go to a very sturdy unit. And I went home silently. In a third-tier city in my hometown, I became a clerk and my monthly salary was less than 3,000 yuan.
 
  The clerk's work is really not technical. My home is very cozy. My home is 20 minutes walk from work and 5 minutes by bike. Before and after work, my mother's delicious meals were waiting for me. We also discussed what to do to eat fresh food every 30 minutes, and went to the nearby mountains to climb mountains, soak in hot springs, and picnic Worry-free, don't know what anxiety is.
 
  When I was working for about eight months, I was suddenly flustered, my heart rate often increased, and my breath was out of breath. At first, I thought it was spring, the weather was getting warmer, and I was a bit uncomfortable. Later, it became more and more serious, and I lost weight.
 
  My parents took me to the doctor and the diagnosis proved to be mild anxiety. The doctor said that there is no need to do anything, that's all right, this is the most suitable state for people to struggle.
 
  The doctor is right. I cannot hide my anxiety about the future. The work of a clerk has comforted me for too long. My friends share their lives from Renren. The words and pictures make me anxious. People who go abroad, travel around, share interesting things from abroad, express their feelings of increasing knowledge; those who are studying graduates, begin to read the book list, write the experience of lectures by famous teachers; the work experience shared by the students who stay in the big cities , for me It is completely another world. I know that they are all madly growing up at their best age. And I was left far behind by them.
 
  Work is safe and unwilling. The deeper reason is that I have no capital to resign. After watching countless soul chicken soups, I chose to read and write and wanted to go further on the road of writing.
 
  For the next two years, I read every day until 12 o'clock after work and sometimes until 3 a.m. These days are the period of my knowledge explosion, and also the time when enrichment and anxiety coexist. I read a lot of books on literature, sociology, psychology, history, and even read books when I'm not busy at work. My leadership is very good, allowing me to read books when I am not busy at work, and if he has time, he will also direct me to read. How many books I read, I haven't calculated, it is probably between 150 and 200. The volume of such readings is not large, but for me with a mediocre qualification, I have opened a magical door.
 
  I ca n’t find the experience and state of mind to share reading with others. We must know that in third-tier cities, there are not so many offline activities like reading clubs in the same city. I started writing.
 
  When I showed the 20 articles I wrote to a cousin who had read creative writing, he praised my work and even said that I had the potential to be a screenwriter.
 
  screenwriter? My eyes brightened. No one around me was engaged in this kind of occupation. Many people watched TV shows.
 
Encouraged by my   cousin , I fluttered up, thinking that one foot had entered the editing pool, and dreamed of one day becoming Li An and Wang Jiawei, maybe I could be famous in the movie circle.
 
  I showed my work to my classmates. My friends wrote full comments on my work. I was very angry at that time, and soon I broke up with friends. Now think about how naive, impulsive, and "second-second" you are. My friend's evaluation is very objective. My work cannot be called a work, and it is no different from a middle school student's composition. Grammatically, mistakes are dense; words are either scarce or artificially stacked with inappropriate ornate words; the entire article is read without fluency, logical words are almost absent, jumping faster than rabbits, and he needs his brain No numbers.
 
  When Fu Lei gave Zhang Ailing a writing opinion, Zhang Ailing was in her early twenties and was in the limelight and could not accept criticisms, even if those criticisms were well-meaning and fair. Zhang Ailing immediately wrote a novel satirizing Fu Lei, and that novel was "Yin Baozhen's Flower House Fair". By March 2013, Song Yilang, the heir to Zhang Ailing's heritage, told us in an article published in "Southern Metropolis Daily" that he was shocked. The actor in "Yin Baozhen's Flower House Meeting", the prototype of the neurotic music professor, is Fu Lei, a well-known translator and critic.
 
  I also wrote an article at the time, ironic to my kind-hearted classmate, and I was torn up after writing. I don't remember what I wrote, I still remember the emotions at that time. Times have changed, and now when I think about myself at that time, my heart is so "dark".
 
  I was not discouraged and continued writing. If the material is not enough, start with the people around you. I "interviewed" my aunt, aunt, aunt, aunt, aunt, my dad, my mom, cousin, cousin, high school classmates, elementary school classmates ... During that time, I met relatives, friends, and even acquaintances. His eyes were shining, as if he saw gold. I compiled their stories into novels and prose.
 
  After three years like this, I wrote a lot of prose and short stories, and three novels. Holding these manuscripts, I kept submitting manuscripts, from the beginning of Shi Shenhai, all the way to fail, to the sporadic news, and then someone asked me for a manuscript. My self-confidence heart soars, accumulated some experience writing, my mind began to pop out a new idea - become a screenwriter.
 
  I talked to my cousin first, because of the limitations of my education and horizons, I was very inferior, and I didn't know how much darkness the road ahead was. My cousin encourages me to follow my dreams boldly.
 
  I talked to my parents about the idea of ​​becoming a screenwriter. My parents didn't agree at first, but later they couldn't beat me and agreed to resign and go out. Before I resigned, my work was approved by a small animation company based in Shenzhen. The manager asked me to try it.
 
  That's it, I went to Shenzhen. When we arrived in Shenzhen, everything was so fresh, and an air of innovation and openness loomed. I rented a house near the company and spent one-fifth of my salary just to commute to work without crowding the subway and save time for work or reading and improve myself.
 
  I started to devote myself to work. Colleagues are young, but they are excellent. There are returnees and 985 masters from prestigious universities. I learn from them inferiority.
 
  Maybe it ’s in a third-tier city in my hometown. I ’ve been self-disciplined for four and a half years. The high-intensity work in Shenzhen not only did not pressure me, but opened up my internal organs, limbs, and limbs. Butt in the sky, my body is in an open posture. My inspiration was endless, and my ideas began to be recognized by my boss and colleagues.
 
  Two years ago, the script I co-authored with my colleagues was valued by investors.
 
  Doing what I love makes my life extra smooth.
 
  My experience is very ordinary, but I returned to my hometown for 5 years before I was good enough. In 5 years, I have accumulated the skills to fight in big cities, I have accumulated the habit of self-discipline, and I have accumulated a strong heart that walks alone in the darkness. Although there are no houses or cars in Shenzhen, I am never confused or anxious about the future.
 
  My classmates have returned from abroad to look for work in various cities; graduate students have begun to work in the workplace to find their social coordinates; most of the students who have worked hard in first-tier cities have returned to their hometowns, and few left Has become the company's middle-level leader.
 
  From the third line to the first line, from the first line to the third line, some people come and some people go. Actually, make what you like and fit, it is the same everywhere