People who are truly high emotional intelligence will only do one thing silently.
 
  1
 
  I have a friend. When you first see him, you will feel that he is in a hurry.
 
  This kind of urgency is not a seemingly rush, but a desire for success.
 
  We met at a meeting, he sat opposite me, and the meeting began, he gave everyone a round of their own business cards. I thought that this was over. Who knows that the meeting is not over yet, he started a new round of WeChat. A lecture, he did not listen to anything, he went to know others, and then left a contact.
 
  He likes to ask me: "All the big media cafes are in their WeChat circle of friends. Do you know what it feels like?" I shook my head. He said: "It's cool, very emboldened, as if there are many things at your fingertips."
 
  It turns out that he relies on others to maintain his self-confidence .
 
  After about half a year, we met again in a salon. This time, he was quiet a lot, neither fiercely to WeChat, nor hard to chat with others. Take a small book in your hand and keep something in mind.
 
  I was curious and asked him: "How do you not want everyone's WeChat?" He shrugged helplessly and said: "This year, I have been adding WeChat, eager to know big coffee, eager to enter the circle, eager Into the high-end group, eager to comment on others, maintain relationships, very tired, and useless."
 
  It turned out that he was unemployed last month and greeted the big buds, hoping that they would recommend a job, but no one would care for him. The article was written, the leader said it was not good, he sent it to the big coffee, and let the big coffee give him some advice. As a result, the people decisively returned three words: no time.
 
  Said, he opened his own WeChat, keep pulling down, let me see his hundreds of WeChat groups, and dozens of big coffee friends. He said that he spends more time here than he does during his working hours, but when he needs help, he can't find one.
 
  He finally repented: Although he knows a lot of people, it seems that the emotional intelligence is very high, but he has no ability, and the high IQ is all nonsense. I can't do it myself, and knowing who is useless.
 
  I suddenly remembered a sentence : "Equivalent exchanges can have an equivalent friendship. If we are not at a level, we will not have the possibility of exchange in the future. I will not have to help you."
 
  Making friends is also utilitarian. Instead of spending time on getting to know more people, it is better to spend time improving your personal value. We always have a lot of misunderstandings about emotional intelligence, thinking that we are good at communication, good at maintaining relationships, talking, and letting others like it, that is, high emotional intelligence. But in fact, the true high emotional intelligence is not outward, but inward. It is first to upgrade itself.
 
  What you have to overcome is your vanity, your desire to show off. What you have to deal with is the cleverness that you always want to show off. If you can't overcome these mentalities, you will always be only a half-slung, hold on, and you can achieve yourself.
 
  People who are truly high emotional intelligence are doing one thing silently, that is, to enhance their own value and shape their personal brand.
 
  2
 
  Some time ago, a new colleague came from the company. It was very polite. No matter who you saw, it was called by my brother and sister. It gave a good impression. Not only did he have a sweet mouth, but he also rushed to take a takeaway at dinner. He walked the last day of work and placed the chairs in the office neatly. When he came in the morning, he also opened all the computers. Save everyone's time.
 
  Although it is a trivial matter, it is also impressive to think of it and stick to it. Colleagues can't stop praising him.
 
  When chatting, the director said that the children after the 95s are really high emotional intelligence, much stronger than their generation. At that time, he only knew a mind-study skill, worked overtime, worked, and did not know how to engage in interpersonal relationships. Everyone expressed their approval. Another colleague also said that when she first started working, she didn't even dare to say anything. When she saw the leader, she pretended not to see it.
 
  However, it was such a person who praised the individual, but he was dismissed without an internship period.
 
  The reason is very simple, he can't do his job.
 
  When he left, he was particularly wronged. He enthusiastically helped his colleagues to do all sorts of chores and trivial things that didn't belong to his work. How could he work poorly?
 
  Yes, all his things are doing very well, but his own tasks are being dropped, but the company is not looking at how good you are doing with others, and who is in good relationship with you, but yourself. How is the matter done?
 
  Good popularity, popularity, and high emotional intelligence are all points, but the company does not assess these, this is not the best embodiment of a person's value.
 
  As an employee, you will eventually return to your own work and stick to your position. This is the biggest bargaining chip you can pass.
 
  3
 
  Because getting along with yourself is much harder than getting along with others. Internal and external transparency, body and mind, and focus on yourself, is the real strength and emotional intelligence.
 
  Learn to get along with yourself, manage yourself, and make yourself stronger. We must first become our own nobles, and others will become our nobles.
 
  A host I like once said: The workplace is like a mirror of life. If there are 100 steps in life, then the 50th step is a balance point. When you are below the 50th step, you are not qualified for negotiation. At this stage, you need to be reluctant, and forbearance is a very important stage. ”
 
  When you have not yet reached the 50th step, you are not qualified for negotiation, and you have no right to speak. Then you have to retreat and slowly build up your strength. Remember: anger without strength is meaningless!
 
  When we no longer pretend to have many friends, we no longer care about the so-called high emotional intelligence, but return to loneliness, that is, when we start living with real people. This is a long, lonely process, but we all need to engrave ourselves through this long time.
 
  The books you have read, the roads you have traveled, the people you love, every loneliness and glory in your body will inject colorful paint into your life , which will make your heart slowly become tough and full. Achieve a unique you.
 
  When you come out, it is full of light.