Dumming - beep -
 
  "Hey, hello, is the Qinghua Hospital Admissions Office?"
 
  "Yes."
 
  "Hello, may I ask for the results now, is there already online?"
 
  "Have."
 
  "Then if I did not find it after I entered it, I was not admitted, is it?"
 
  "Correct."
 
  "Well, thank you."
 
  Duo-beep-beep-beep-
 
  ......
 
  Putting down the phone, I feel that things have ended, and my life has been rewritten.
 
  Dream broken Tsinghua
 
  Three years of dreams , prepared for a year, seeing success , the result is still a failure.
 
  I have been reluctant to mention this matter, only to a few of the more close people around me. After a year, I still said it, and it was a great pleasure.
 
  Tsinghua University is the top art school in the country. The art design profession that I applied for is only 15 people per year. In Tianjin, the admission scores of previous years are similar to the admission scores of Nankai University.
 
  The son of a friend of my father, also the senior school of Tianjin No. 1 Middle School, was admitted to the Qinghua Academy in the same year. He was tested three times and did not take it. He finally went to the Tianda Architecture Department. This is my initial understanding of Qing Mei.
 
  Of course, the one he tested is a design major. The requirements for professional courses are quite high, almost the top level in the country. The major I want to test is not very high on the level of art majors. It is easy to draw a picture. The key is the knowledge of art history and the scores of the college entrance examination culture class.
 
  Just the third year when
 
  I don’t feel awkward about the fear of college entrance examinations or the expectations of college students. I don’t have any idea about where I want to test and where I can test. I don’t know anything about it.
 
  One day, I accidentally saw the information about the Qinghua Academy on the Internet. I learned more about it, feeling, hey, this is good, it is in line with my conditions and characteristics.
 
  I talked to my parents about this idea and told the truth. At that time, they just listened to a happy state. They didn’t take it seriously. They felt that they were with me from both Tsinghua and the Academy of Fine Arts. It doesn't matter. It wasn't until seven months later that I took the fifth place in the professional class and they felt my thoughts.
 
  get ready
 
  On January 12th, 2013, it was the day of the Tianjin City Art Joint Examination. If you want to report to the art college, you must pass this exam. Before you asked the seniors, this exam is difficult. It is said that you can pass it. The level is equivalent to the examination of the cultural class, but I have nothing to do.
 
  The examination room was in Tianjin Normal University. On that day, it was very cold. In the morning, it was still misty. At the entrance of the examination room, I met a lot of students wearing the same clothes and the same color scarf, just like Harry. In Porter, it is clear that they are all studios, or come together with the same training institution. I deeply feel that amateurs have met the body correction rules, just like they used to participate in the city track and field competition.
 
  But fortunately, the exam is not difficult, and finally passed.
 
  When the second year of the next year, I have to go to Tsinghua to take a professional course. Unlike the general art examination, the examination of Qingmei is composed of two parts. One is sketching, which is not a big percentage, and as long as it is painted, You can get a score of 18 points (out of 20 points).
 
  More important is the art history theory knowledge, this has no review scope, the only reference book is the "literary common sense" of Chongqing University Press, but there are many contents, all the knowledge related to art in ancient and modern China and foreign countries. Seeing, and there is still a lot of literary knowledge, you need to be well-rounded. This must have occupied a lot of time for me to study . From February to the test, the results are not very satisfactory. However, I still hope to persevere . When I am on the winter vacation, I am afraid that I will be greedy at home. I will go to the district library and sit down. It is one day. The book "Arts and Common Sense" has been ruined by me. I always feel that I am not at ease. I feel tired when I do it. I want to relax and relax with a math problem. The water in the teacup has always been soaked by me without color.
 
  Going to the exam
 
  On February 18th, at noon, I went to the office and asked the teacher, Teacher Hu, to open a three-day holiday. Teacher Hu asked me where to go. I said that I went to the Beijing exam. Teacher Hu asked, which school to take, I did not say, just smiled and shook his head.
 
  On the morning of February 19, I prepared things. The Qingmei exam must be confirmed two days in advance. In order to delay the least class, my father and I decided to go to the noon on the day of the confirmation. At noon, I entrusted the classmates to the classmates. I went back to the dormitory, carrying a picture clip, going to the subway station to find my father, and taking the intercity high-speed train to Beijing.
 
  Soon, when I arrived in Beijing, I went to Wudaokou and reported it. Really, it was the first time. I felt the breath of Tsinghua, some excitement, and some uncontrollable repression. On that day, the weather was still cold and the wind was very large. I walked in from the small door on the side of the Academy of Fine Arts building, took photos, confirmed, and obtained the admission certificate. Everything went smoothly.
 
  Out of school, go to the school two or three kilometers away from the school, book a seven-day hotel in advance. Now think of it, that memory is so vague, the feelings happen yesterday, and I feel like I am born in a dream. I didn't have the mind to go online, I just couldn't read the book. QQ didn't go up, and my classmate's text message didn't return. The two days were disconnected from the outside world.
 
  Occasionally, watching TV, news, remember very clearly, in those days, there are only three things on TV: European beef mixed with horse meat, the history of the most rigorous city of the country, the blue mysterious death...
 
  The next day, I really couldn't stay. I said that I wanted to go out and sneak out, but I found out that there was nothing to be left around, and it felt very deserted. I told my father, you see, the names of the neighborhoods and residential buildings around Tsinghua are all with the words "Qing" or "Hua", all because of this university. My father said, this is a good example. Tianjin, a whole Nankai District, county-level administrative unit, is still named because of Nankai.
 
  On the day of the test, I thought it was coming out early, but the result was still a little late. There was a lot of people under the building of the Academy of Fine Arts. A rough estimate, there are thousands of people. Go to the front and rank in the team. By the time, the big iron gate opened, the security guard took the students, went upstairs to the classroom examination room, walked in the corridor, dim light, shined on the wall, some pictures of famous cultural relics, some of the excellent works of the graduates, feeling This is indeed the hall of art.
 
  The morning is the foundation of literature and art, and the most important part. In this, the most important thing is the 1500-word essay . Before, my sister told me that this composition is not about how good your writing is, and the teachers are more interested. It is the student's idea that is unique, and it is generally difficult to grasp the intent of the person.
 
  When I got the paper, I first saw the composition. The topic was that you started your discussion around "Beautiful China." This topic is still quite satisfactory. I just took a look and didn't think much. I did the basic questions before. Basic knowledge. Not bad, except for a few questions about music and dance art, I didn't answer it. The rest will basically be done, and it is quite sure.
 
  The girl next to me, in the heating room, is still wearing a big down jacket. Obviously, she has been using the mobile phone to check the answer throughout the exam. When the teacher comes over, she will take a look at it. I look in my eyes, but the teacher does not care. . I think I will not do this kind of thing. First, because my hand is too stupid, as long as I cheat, I must let the teacher discover it. Second, I am prepared enough. I don’t want to lose one or two because of one or two questions. Integrity.
 
  Another one is to write a small comment on a fine art work. I prepared it in advance. I am preparing for the Han Dynasty’s long letter lantern, for two reasons. One is because the Changxin Palace lantern is a craft. Art works, the predecessor of Qinghua Academy is the China Academy of Arts and Crafts, and now it is more important for arts and crafts, should be in line with the teacher's taste. Secondly, the scientific value of Changxin Palace lanterns is more prominent. It uses water in the lamp and uses the sleeves of the palace ladies as a passage to precipitate the waste smoke generated by the burning of the lamps in the water. All the cleaning can be dismantled to ensure the indoor air quality. .
 
  The reason why this point is highlighted is that during that period, smog and PM2.5 became hot topics in the country, and it was in the smoggy and devastating area of ​​Beijing. Every day, the teachers must have a deep understanding. At the end of the small commentary, I said: "The Han Dynasty people two thousand years ago have realized the integration of art and environmental protection technology in the production of arts and crafts. This is in the process of arts and crafts production for the day when our air quality is deteriorating. , has a very important guiding significance."
 
  And the last big head is the big composition. I am not particularly worried, because my handwriting is my advantage, I will definitely add some points, but I don't know how to write color.
 
  Knowing that there is still an hour left, my composition is still conceived. Suddenly, I am inspired to think of the seven-character poems that I won in the new concept national essay competition. I am more positive. I recall I took a few dozen sentences from it, and started to write a primer, all the way to the end, all written in classical Chinese. In fact, this is more disadvantageous, because the number of words is not enough, so at the end, I used a lot of the "Diamond Sutra" Sentence, the same meaning, repeated, can also give people a sense of comparison. Among them, I also used the Tsinghua school motto "Tian Xingjian, the gentleman to self-improvement; the terrain is Kun, the gentleman carries the virtues", to tell the teacher, I am prepared. One hour, 1,500 words, a piece of "Beautiful China", completed.
 
  In the afternoon, the sketch test is much easier. The painting is still life, which is relatively simple.
 
  When the exam came out, I chatted with a guy from Wuhan, Hubei. He looked bigger than me. I asked him if he only took the Tsinghua school. He said, no, he has already taken the exams of more than a dozen schools across the country. He has been outside for three months. He has never returned home. He said, he bowed his head, I am deep. I feel that there is too much difference between myself and others. However, candidates like him do not know how many.
 
  On the way to the high-speed rail back to Tianjin, the sky is already dark, looking at the lights outside the speeding train, telling my dad, I feel that sometimes life is an experience, what is the result, it does not matter.
 
  Samantabhadra Christmas
 
  On April 1st, 2013, Lunar New Year's Eve in February, Puxian Bodhisattva Christmas Day, at 4 o'clock in the morning, came out of the dormitory, took the futon, went to the classroom of Block A, the corridor is still relatively dark, the whole building, no A person, also a bit cold, as usual, an hour, chanting, praying. The mobile phone is still charging in the classroom. When I was about to pull it out, it suddenly rang. I saw it, my dad, I was scared, so early, what happened?
 
  "Hey?"
 
  "Hey, in the classroom?"
 
  "Ok."
 
  "The division of the Academy of Fine Arts is out."
 
  I was shocked by the cold sweat, and the gas was very thick.
 
  "How about, how?"
 
  "Well, it’s over."
 
  I heard a sigh of relief.
 
  "Sketch 18 points, 174 points of literature and art, total score 192. National ranking..."
 
  "Ok?"
 
  "the fifth place."
 
  I couldn't believe my ears at the time. I just thought that if I could, it would be just a hundred or so in the country. I didn't expect that the results were so good, but in any case, this news definitely gave me a shot. Because as long as I pass, I have already succeeded in 90%, but unsuccessful, the previous efforts are in vain.
 
  Putting down the phone, I felt almost sweat on the back of the wall, but it didn't matter. I walked out of the school gate, walked on the boardwalk, breathed the morning sun, looked at the front, and rose from the east bank of the Haihe River. The sun feels that the world belongs to oneself. If you take a picture of me, you must use Brian Adams's "hereiam" as an accompaniment, happy like a child.
 
  But for me to pass this incident, except me and my dad, my mom, did not tell the third person, including my other family members. I didn't show up with my classmates. The teacher didn't know, just how to learn how to learn as usual. Classmates have to pay for the second-level athletes at home, and there are also people who are looking for a good way, but I don’t think it’s better to say no, but don’t be arrogant.
 
  One day in May, my father suddenly called me when I was in class. I gave him back in class. It turned out that he asked someone to ask. There are only two candidates in Tianjin who passed the professional examination this year, because in principle No more than three people can be enrolled in the same province. If there are three or more people who meet the standards, these people must compete. There are only two, which means that as long as I win the test and play it normally, I don’t need a high score to get it. Because in the past few years, there were more than three candidates in Tianjin. There were only two people in the first time this year, so it was a golden opportunity for me.
 
  No. 7 and No. 8
 
  For the college entrance examination, I am still more confident, full preparation, full state, twenty high schools, my blessed land, plus the entrance to the examination room, and the dialogue with the standard champion Fan Yaoyao, is simply a good time.
 
  On the 9th, it was the time to send the answer. I didn't go home. I still lived at school. At 10 o'clock in the morning, the answer came. The school asked the students to evaluate in principle. I got the answer and didn't dare to go to the classroom. Look, go to the empty classroom at the end of the corridor. I personally estimate that when I was reading the topic, I heard that the 13th class (the liberal arts key class) next door had a girl crying, and my heart was also tight. But fortunately, it is OK to conservatively estimate your score.
 
  In the afternoon, it suddenly rained. I was alone in the car and went to the Great Depression. This is the place I must come when I am frustrated. The Great Depression is next to the Tianjin Academy of Fine Arts. Whenever I am not happy, I will Let go of everything, come here for a long time, and when you leave, go to the days of the United States to buy a bunch of things to vent.
 
  When I got to the place, the rain grew bigger and bigger. There was almost no one in the temple. If I had a scent, I couldn’t hold an umbrella. Before the incense burner, I simply threw the umbrella aside. The rain was bigger, but I couldn’t stop the slight incense. First, I went to the Buddha, and later worshipped the Buddha. The foreign students from India read the classics in the Daxiong Hall. I sat in front of the temple, crusted, and the rain flowed along the flying dragonfly. Sometimes the water droplets drenched from the Vatan. Sitting quietly for a while, I don’t know how long it took, hey, a group of pigeons decided to fly and suddenly, the clouds were scattered, the rain, and lived.
 
  Fill in the volunteer
 
  Sure enough, after the next minute, it was OK. Director Li of the Nankai University Admissions Office went to the middle of the day to give a lecture. At the door of the broadcasting room, I personally asked Director Li to know that the score was higher than that of Nankai. Still not considered. It's not because I want to go south, but I feel that this standard is not a big problem.
 
  However, a line in 2013 has risen a lot, which is very unfavorable to me. I didn't think too much, because even if it is up, there is still room for it, but my father feels something is wrong.
 
  On June 25th, as in previous years, on the Dazhong Road in the Nankai campus, the consultation points of hundreds of universities across the country, one school and one booth, of course, Nankai, is a booth of a college, only when it was casual, said To be honest, don't look at me as a native of Tianjin. Before that time, I rarely, even said that I have never been to Nankai campus. Before I came here, I didn't think I would have any relationship with this school. .
 
  I saw a brand at the time, Zhou Enlai government management school, what is this? It’s quite awkward. When I was watching, Zhu Gongwei’s brother, who was there, also greeted me.
 
  After consulting a sneak peek, holding the professional development flyers developed by South, I am considering more professionalism. Of course, my father is still more cautious than me. I think that the problem of clear beauty is not big anyway. If you open this in the south, just fill it out. .
 
  Sitting on the small stone bench in the south main bridge, I gave my dad a lot of specialties that I didn't like. He ranked six in the professional grades that I didn't cross out. They are Chinese international education, editing and publishing, Chinese language and literature, international politics, social work, and ideological and political education.
 
  Only one point
 
  The professional calculation method of Qingmei is unique. It is based on the scores of all the candidates who pass the professional examinations, divided by the ratio of the line of the provinces and cities, and the top 15 is accepted, instead of the professional grades. In the end, my ratio is 1.1332, and the fifteenth rate of the actual admission is 1.1340. In terms of ratio, it is only 0.0008, which means that it is equivalent to less than one point, that is, the top 15 in the country. I am the 16th.
 
  Here, I also want to take the last list. It should be a sister from Chongqing. If I take a test for the college entrance examination, it’s just one point. Our two lives have been completely rewritten, but fortunately, you No. I also want to say to the classmates of the 2013 Qingmei Art Museum. It is a pity that we are only a little bit worse. We have not been able to become classmates, but we also hope to know you.
 
  Tsinghua’s admission inquiry was relatively early. I filled in the relevant information on the official website of the official website. When I found the result, it was recorded. I even searched for a few days, and there was no result, so the scene appeared at the beginning.
 
  After being depressed for a few days at home, I was actually crazy for a few days. I was crying and screaming. I didn’t believe it was true. After I knew the news at noon that day, my parents were afraid that I couldn’t think of it. Looking back at me, it was actually not that serious. My mother said that my two most repetitive two-day sentences were "failed" and "how can I not take more points?"
 
  My mother looked at me sad, she also cried, and I in turn advised her. Anyway, from the beginning to the end, I have to test myself. If I can't get it, I can't test it. It doesn't matter. My father has been persuading me: the front is so smooth, but in the end it is so small, so arranged, there must be God.
 
  Why do you like it so much?
 
  To be honest, I have been particularly interested in art from a very small age, but I have also studied professionally. However, because I was practicing sports in junior high school, I was delayed. I was not able to draw pictures because of my studies in high school, but for all these things and art. The things related are very interesting.
 
  One of my teachers once said: It is a shame for a boy to find a job, but it is even more shameful to find a job with a diploma. Although I can't understand his words very well, I know that colleges must choose a major that they are interested in. After all, interest is the best teacher. However, apart from art history, I feel that there is no major in the university that I am interested in.
 
  I had hoped that I could become an artist or an art researcher. In the masterpiece of the wisdom of the ancient working people, it might be that my father’s love of the antique collection influenced me. However, he always persuaded me. There are some things that can't be done, and it's good to be interested.
 
  Today
 
  I believe that time will kill everything. And when talking to anyone, I can also proudly say: "When the brother was also poorly admitted to Tsinghua!" This is quite interesting.
 
  Later, I talked to a better classmate about this matter, but he gave me a different answer: "I don't think you have taken it well. I heard that "Tsinghua" is awesome, but the Qinghua Academy I think it’s better to listen to you than to say that you are from Nankai."
 
  I don't think so, but one of my teachers told me that Qingmei is very powerful. China's top art colleges, of course, are in the eyes of people who know how to do it. People who don't understand think this is a book or something else; However, he is a person who knows how to do it, he has to ask you, what is your profession in Qingmei? If you say that you are a design class or a painting class, people will immediately look at it and the level is good, but when you say that you are a professional in art design (history), people will think, oh, that’s the case. child.
 
  What they are saying is not the case, I don't want to think too much, and it is not necessary.
 
  Some words
 
  Some people say that the charm of the college entrance examination lies in its yin and yin, I think I must be the most yin.
 
  In fact, really, this school, for me, what is the meaning, is no longer important. My hate and regret, all efforts and progress are step by step, step by step, very smooth, just the last failure, just a little bit, just like the dominoes that have been put on for a long time, careless at the last minute I knocked down one from the middle, maybe I don't care what kind of beautiful pattern it would be after it fell, but I care if it falls down smoothly.
 
  Dominoes can be re-arranged, and life can't come again. Some people say that if you like it so much, why don't you repeat it and try again? I want to say that if you repeat, the significance of the college entrance examination for my life will be lost. And maybe it’s really God’s will, the arrangement of Buddha and Bodhisattva, in order to let me come to Nankai, meet the people I should meet, experience what I should experience, or how can it be only a little bit worse, you said ,right.